If you’ve texted or called one of your besties to lament “I gave him my number and he didn’t text me”, you’re not alone. Just about everyone will have to deal with this kind of situation at some point. Read on to discover a few different reasons why it might be happening to you.
What Does It Mean If You Give a Guy Your Number and He Doesn’t Text You
There can be several different reasons why a guy hasn’t texted or called after you gave him your number:
1. He’s Super Busy
Time can move really quickly, especially if you have a million things going on. Since you just gave the guy your number, you really have no idea what might be going on in his world. Is he crazy busy at work? Swamped with school studies? Is it his week with his kids? Give him the benefit of the doubt (and a bit more time) before assuming the worst.
2. The Guy Can’t Find Your Number
Did you write your phone number down on paper to give it to him? Or did he program it right into his phone? If you just offered it on a scrap of paper, he might have misplaced it. That’s probably happened to you too, at some point: you’re really into someone, but can’t find that vital piece of info that they offered you. It’s awful, but happens more often than you’d think.
3. He Got Your Info Wrong
Let’s say you met a hot guy at a club and gave him your number. You both might have been slightly (or more than slightly…) inebriated at the time, so when he entered your name into his phone, he might have made a mistake. Maybe he got a couple of digits reversed, or can’t remember your name (Lisa? Laura? Damn…).
4. Things Might Have Gotten Serious with Someone Else
If this guy has been dating a few different people, and has decided to get serious with one of them, chances are he’ll cut off contact with the others. This includes not texting or calling new people he might have met.
5. He Just Might Not Be Into You
Nobody likes to feel rejected, but none of us are to everyone else’s taste. Quite often, when someone is approached and offered a phone number, they’ll accept it out of politeness even if they’re not interested. This is less awkward (or embarrassing) than telling the person to their face that they don’t want their number. Few people want to think about this answer, but it’s a very real possibility.
How Long Does It Take a Man to Call After You Give Him Your Number
That depends a lot on the guy and his texting habits. Some like to abide by the so-called “rules” of contacting women, in which they’re supposed to wait 48–72 hours before reaching out. Supposedly, this is to show that they’re not over-eager. The general belief seems to be that seeming aloof and unavailable makes them more attractive.
Some guys use this technique, and some women like it. That said, there’s no one-size-fits-all answer, here. If a guy’s really into you, he may call you within a couple of hours after you give him your number. Would that seem over-eager and creepy to you? Or would you like the fact that he’s really into you?
Generally speaking, however, you can expect to hear from a guy within a week or two of giving him your number.
How Long Should I Wait for the Text?
That’s up to you, really. When you say you’re “waiting” for a text, however, that implies that all your anxiety (or reassurance) is in someone else’s hands. Yes, you gave this guy your info, but that doesn’t mean that your life is on hold while you’re waiting to see if he’ll text/call or not.
Have you stopped working, eating, sleeping, or talking to your friends until you hear from this dude? No, and why should you? Sure, it’ll be great to get to know someone new, but don’t focus all your time and energy on that one thing.
Generally speaking, give it a couple of weeks. That takes into account his life circ*mstances and responsibilities. If he’s sincerely interested, and hasn’t accidentally lost or deleted your number, you should hear from him within this time.
Of course, any number of things can get in the way of people getting in touch. For instance, if one of his parents dies unexpectedly, he might not reach out to anyone for a month or two. That isn’t out of lack of interest, but that he’s emotionally overwhelmed and has to go through his own grieving process, as long as that takes.
It’s Been a Week Since I Gave Him My Number
Okay, take a deep breath and center yourself.
A week really isn’t that long when it comes to conversation. People have really busy lives, and sometimes a week or two will go by before they can re-ground themselves and pick up where they left off. How often have you looked at the calendar and wondered how it was two weeks since you last did something?
Try to focus on things other than checking your phone every five minutes to see if he’s texted. If you had never met this guy, and hadn’t given him your number, what else would you be doing right now? Do that.
Most people get anxious when others don’t contact them because they’ve built up expectations. You’ve gone this long without this person in your life, so you know you’re fine without talking to him. Focus on this moment, not the “what ifs” swirling around in your head. Your world doesn’t revolve around whether a guy talks to you or not.
If and when he texts, respond accordingly. But right now? Bring your attention back to living your best life for yourself.
I Gave Him My Number But He Didn’t Give Me His – What Should I Do?
If you have social anxiety, chances are you may be freaking out because you haven’t heard from him yet. This kind of anxiety is magnified when it comes to texting because you don’t have any other recourse for communication. The ball is completely in someone else’s court. He has your number, but you don’t have his… nor his email, or any other way to contact him.
That can be really unnerving, especially for people who like to feel a sense of control in their own lives.
Do you have friends in common with this person? If so, ask them to pass a message along to him that you enjoyed meeting him, but leave it at that. You don’t want to come across as needy or desperate. In contrast, if you don’t have any friends in common, avoid stalking him on social media.
Consider how you’d feel if you gave a guy your number, and he messaged you on Facebook or IG because he felt like you didn’t contact him soon enough. Would you feel flattered? Or would you feel unnerved because he’s acting like a stalker?
Don’t be that guy.
Wrap Up
As you can see, there can be many different reasons why a guy hasn’t gotten in touch. “I gave him my number and he didn’t text me” doesn’t need to be a statement for concern. It’s just an aspect of life that will be sorted out one way or another.
You might hear from the guy soon, or he might pop up months from now. Or you might not hear from him at all. People drift in and out of each other’s lives all the time, and not every connection needs to lead somewhere. You know the expression “everything happens for a reason”? Well, sometimes things don’t happen for a very good reason.
Sure, this guy might have seemed amazing when you gave him your number… but he might be a narcissist, or have borderline personality disorder. There could be tons of things about him that you’d rather not have in your life, but you’re hyper-focused on the fact that he hasn’t texted you yet.
If it’s meant to be, it’ll happen. And if it doesn’t, it’ll happen with someone else when the time is right.
